Saturday, August 24, 2013

Boss Makes Pretty-Paper-Picture-Story Pages Big and Then Boss Makes Pretty-Paper-Picture-Story Pages Smaller

I am rolling my eyes at this.  And Boss is too.  But Boss says this is what happens when you are the "flexible" words and the "willing to be challenged" words.  I say this is what happens when you are the "totally deluded by your own talent" words and the "thinking things are easier than they actually are words".  Boss concedes that I may be having a point with these words.

Boss has been making pretty-paper-picture-story pages for The ScrapRoom for over a year now.  This is like... a little over a year in dog years.  Do not get me started on this topic again.  I will not go there with you.  Seriously, people, dogs are living on the same timeline as peoples.  I promise.  Soon after Boss started this designing pretty-paper-picture-story pages for The ScrapRoom, Boss was asked to make some of them 12x12 size.  This is ginormous huge when you are used to 8.5x11 size pages.  I guess.  I would actually have no idea as I would not make a pretty-paper-picture-story page if I could help it.  No, I would not.  "Look," I would say, "I do not have opposable thumbs, I can not make pretty-paper-picture-story pages for The ScrapRoom or anyone else."  And then I would be safe from that nonsense.  But Boss fell for this line.  She is gullibleness sometimes.  Or maybe just nice.  But I do not know for sure, as this is the woman that made Player and Talker eat beets.

So Boss made 12x12 pretty-paper-picture-story pages for The ScrapRoom and then had to make them small to fit in her books.  Boss is not going 12x12, no, she is not.  Do not even suggest it.  If you do this, even though I warn you to not do this, she goes a little crazy with the emphatic arm gestures and words and frowny forehead.  But she does admit that if she starts with 12x12 pretty-paper-picture-story pages for The ScrapRoom and makes it smaller, then every time she really likes the 12x12 pretty-paper-picture-story pages for The ScrapRoom better.  But that is too bad, they get small anyway.  And I will share them with you now, along with some really entertaining commentary that Boss probably will not approve of.

So actually Boss made the small one first and then got asked to make it bigger.  So Boss put the small pretty-paper-picture-story pages on top of big paper with some scraps and called it done.  Pretty much cheatness, I think.  Although pretty cleverness, too.
Boss quickly realized that making pretty-paper-picture-story pages big was going to be a problem for getting them into her smaller books.  And Boss is not the sort of person to make a pretty-paper-picture-story page for show and then not use it.  Boss is the "not going to waste my time" words.  So Boss ended up wasting a lot of time anyway on this one.  Boss had the not-so-brilliant idea to make the pretty-paper-picture-story page small, then use the "Photoshop" word to make it big.  This involved lots of swearing, a threatened divorce (no, they did not even discuss who would get to keep me), and the "I am never doing it this way again!" words.  Which turned out to be true, and there is no divorce happening here after all.
 
Boss planned this one a lot.  A LOT.  She did not want to do a lot of taping and pop-dotting (yes, this is a real thing, I do not joke about these things) and then trying to peel off all that nonsense.  So Boss made the big pretty-paper-picture-story pages without tape or pop-dots or anything stickiness.  Just all loose and "do not let the cats in here again!" words.  Then Boss took the picture and then made the pretty-paper-picture-story page for reals with tape and pop-dots but smaller.
This turned out to be the favorite way of making big pretty-paper-picture-story pages into small pretty-paper-picture-story pages.  Boss just puts all the good stuff in the center of the pretty-paper-picture-story page and plans to cut off the rest.  Unfortunately, this also is the most disappointingness way to make small pretty-paper-picture-story pages out of big pretty-paper-picture-story pages.  Because then the white space disappears and it is very much a happy thing, this white space.  Even if it is brown.  Whatever.
 
So Boss goes with the "cut it and live with it" words here, but you see that some of the flower things had to be moved over and that the very fancy border was cut off and taped back on afterwards.  Boss gave the frowny forehead face to this small pretty-paper-picture-story page when she was done and was very much unhappiness with it but she says she is done and that done is good.
 
Boss did the cutting thing again here, but there a few thingies that had to move.  "Thingies" are what Boss calls the "elements" words, but I am not a pretentious dog and will not use words of fanciness when simple words will do just fine.
 
Boss planned this one very carefully also.  She did a lot of sewing and did not want to ruin that stuffses.  So she made the big pretty-paper-picture-story pages with the idea that the "swim" word could be cut off, and the picture of Talker could be made smaller.  And it worked out just fine, although Boss does miss the white space that she got used to seeing.  Even if it was grey.  Or gray?  Oh, whatever.
There is very much sneakiness going on here!  Boss left lots of space to cut off in the very beginning, but then there was too much space so boss added the ticket things to the big pretty-paper-picture-story pages and it was awesomeness.  But then the cutting thing happened and suddenly there was no room for the ticket things or the word things!  And this was horrible to Boss, because the word things are a very important part of all of the pretty-paper-picture-story pages she makes.  So she got clever and used smaller tickets (with the writing of Talker and Player on them) and made hidden journaling with the words.  See the tab at the top of the small pretty-paper-picture-story page?  That is where the journaling is hidden.  It is not actually that sneaky.  But Boss thinks so.
 
Boss is not particularly proud of this one, but she says the "it is done" words and shrugs and changes the subject.  I think Boss feels a little embarrassed at the big pretty-paper-picture-story pages because they are actually quite small but made to just look big.  And then Boss put them on bigger paper to make small pretty-paper-picture-story pages.
Boss made this big pretty-paper-picture-story page to be able to be cut with no extra work on her part.  Which, of course, involved lots and lots of extra work on her part in the beginning but you should have been here for the big excitementness that Boss had when she cut the big pretty-paper-picture-story pages into small pretty-paper-picture-story pages in like 15 seconds.  "Now *that* is what I'm talkin' about, Willis!" are the words of Boss.  I do not understand.  My name is Grey.
 
Boss did the same 15 second cutting thing here but really regrets the loss of white space.  Again.  Even though it is yellow.
 
Oh, very much cleverness on this one!  Boss had to cut the sewn banner off and restick it, and also had to peel off the title and restick that, too.  Oh, and the picture of Player had to be made smaller and cuter, like he is in this photo.  He got bigger this year, a lot bigger, but this picture was taken before that.  Awwwww, he is adorableness!
This is the one I had to leave the room for.  There was a lot of swearing.  A LOT.  And a lot of the Un-Du chemical stuff that makes me sneeze.  Boss says it is lucky we do not live in the state of California, because the Un-Du chemical stuff apparently causes cancer in the state of California but somehow not here.  We are very much luckiness to not live in the state of California, then.  I am now very worried for brother-of-Boss and the wife-of-brother-of-Boss, because they live in the state of California and are in EXTREME DANGER.  Be carefulness out there!!!!

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Boss Gets Deep and Has Some Kind of Revelation

And Boss not the only one who has been learning things about themselves.  I have some big-time revelations myself.  Can you believe that just this week I finally discovered that grasshoppers are absolute yumness?  And that at night they are slow and not so hoppy and much much easier to stalk and jump on chew on in great thoughtfulness?  And that if I eat lots and lots of grasshoppers because there are so many and they are so slow and not so hoppy at night and I stalk them one by one and chew them up very carefully and thoroughness... I will yak them all up.  Yes I will!  And then, the most amazingness thing of all is this:  they are just as tasty if you eat them right away after you yak them up.  Yes!  Can you believe this?  I know!  I have had a wonderful week of discovery and deep thinking and revelations. 

And so has Boss.  But she had to take a class to do this deep thinking and revelation stuffses.  It was a class over at Big Picture Classes and it was taught by Stacy Julian and Boss followed almost all of the instructions.  She really was going to follow all of them and trust Stacy because Stacy said to do that because taking a class is all about learning new things so just go with her on this one already, but the problem is that the happy color of Boss is white.

No, I can not explain this any better.  And I did use the most correctness of words.  This happy color has to be on every pretty-paper-picture-story page on the book that boss made in the class of Stacy, but sometimes the background of the paper also had to be white, so Boss did the "improvisation" word which means adding more patterned paper than necessary and skipping a step.  But she really did follow most of the rules and is a very much happiness Boss:  both with the book thing and in her heart and mind.  (This last part is all the words of Boss.  I can not write such sappy ridiculousness myself.)

And now here is the book of Boss with the deep revelations.  Click each picture to read horribly girly Boss journaling words if you have the time and the tissue things.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Player and Talker are Missing, or June Teeny Pretty-Paper-Picture-Story Pages

Not that I want to alarm anyone, but Player and Talker are missing and Boss and Big One do not seem to care.  No, they do not.  In fact, they are somewhat giddy and have been drinking wine and eating popcorn and saying things about how the house stays amazing clean when no one is home to mess it up.  So by this I know that they know that Player and Talker are missing and I know that they know that I know because they have said I will have to walk with them since the boys are not home.  I am a little concerned for my safety.  Yes, I will say it.  What if they walk me somewhere and leave me there?  What if the bat crazy cat is right and Talker is really an organ-harvesting zombie and this is just the beginning of how it will end horribly for us all?  What if the boys never come home and I will have to sleep in the bed of Talker all by myself?  And eat all the leftover popcorn by myself?  And get all of the extra attention from Boss and Big One?

Hm.  Maybe I will just wait and not be alarmed by where Player and Talker have gotten to.  It is actually quite nice to have the house so clean, is it not?  

June 2013 Teeny Pretty-Paper-Picture-Story Pages